Where my Story began…
I remember vividly the dryness in the air that day and my mother’s salty tears pressed against my cheeks. Everything in my body wanted to soothe away her pain. I remember holding her in my twelve-year-old arms and wiping her face. Perhaps it was here I learnt to empathise and here that I discovered I had the capacity to comfort people and ease their pain.
Reading about suffering and actually experiencing and holding it in your arms are two entirely different things.
I originally came from Pakistan as the first woman in my family to study abroad, completing degrees in both Economics and Law. I entered the legal profession with the intention to help those without a voice, however I soon discovered it was not an environment in which I could thrive.
My sister and I decided to start our own business; she was a very talented interior designer, so we opened our own high-end interior design business; I took care of the marketing strategy and contracts while my sister focused on the interior and financial aspects.
We were young and successful and led glamorous lives, but it wasn’t enough for me. I felt there was always something missing, and while I couldn’t understand it then, I felt empty.
Asian culture in particular dictates that women should be married by a certain age, and if we haven’t ‘settled’ by a particular time then we are looked upon as inferior to those that have.
I didn’t want to ‘just’ marry, even though I was lonely and feared loneliness at times. I wanted to marry for love and tried my best to put aside and unlearn any thoughts of depression, anger, worry, negativity and loneliness.
My search for love led me to dramatic and toxic relationships, with a series of patterns, leading to resentment. But eventually through the cracks of darkness came light, and I began my spiritual path. I began to study about how important a positive mindset was on mental wellbeing. It took me a long time to dissolve my anger and break the patterns I had become accustomed to.
For real, lasting change is not instant and requires both time and effort.
This experience led me to a different path I dedicated myself to understanding how we are affected by emotional trauma, to develop ways in which that trauma can be managed and how to accept both myself, and others. I began to finally understand what was “missing” in my life.
I began practising various forms of yoga and was able to build upon my love for theology and knowledge with spiritual teachings from various traditions. I began to study in particular, Yogic, Shamanic, Islamic, Taoism, Christian, Judaism, Buddhist and Sufi spiritual teachings, and as my knowledge increased, I made efforts to help guide those who were in a similar position to that in which I had been.
And then, I got the worst phone call in my life. My best friend, Charlie* a devout Buddhist with the warmest smile who I lived with for three years had passed away.
Charlie always had problems expressing her emotions and releasing painful experiences. She took everyone’s problems on her shoulders and unfortunately the stress and pressure she had placed on herself had become too much. She developed a brain aneurism a month before she was due to be married.
It felt as if a part of my heart had been ripped from my body and died alongside her. I would never again laugh at or reminisce our shared life experiences, that I would never see her walk down the aisle to her husband or hear her voice.
*I have changed her name to protect her privacy.
I’m Ayisha, your dedicated, holistic intuitive therapist - here to help you heal.
Over time, I have built on my experience as a natural problem solver with an analytic mind. I’m here to help you navigate the emotional, personal and professional challenges of life, to accept difficult feelings and to finally let go of emotional baggage so you can embrace your potential, unburden yourself of fear and achieve balance in your life.